PREMISE
A fading celebrity takes a black-market drug: a cell-replicating substance that temporarily creates a younger, better version of herself.
THE GOOD STUFF
DEMI F******MOORE – Throughout the last couple of decades, I think we’ve grossly misjudged how consistently good Demi Moore has been when she is given things to show off. Many people out there rush to judgment and say that this is her greatest overall performance. This is incorrect. However, it’s the bronze medal, to be fair (Alongside ghost and GI Jane). Playing the older version of her character Sparkle, her particular parts of the film are easily the best parts. She’s funny, heartbreaking, and quite creepy as the film goes along.
I don’t know if someone can be both a legend and underrated, but Demi Moore has always been that. Many people may refer to this role as her “comeback” or whatever, but she’s always been around. She’s always been doing quality stuff. People just don’t seem to be paying attention like they should.
MARGARET QUALLEY (THE GOOD) – I will keep this part short and sweet because it needs to be said. The performance of Qualley is quite good. In fact, at times her intensity does match Demi Moore’s in every way when it needs to. I don’t believe she’s been given enough meat to work with in comparison, but she’s excellent here. Qualley has never really been bad in anything, and she’s been given the room to chew up a scene or two. Nothing wrong with this performance. Nothing.
TECHNICAL MOVIE STUFF – Hard to pinpoint what technical aspects of this film are not done in a very impressive way. The production design and costumes are on point, and this movie feels dystopian-ish, yet it’s filled with enough bright colors and unique camera angles to make it all a very strange nightmare to be a part of.
There are a lot of horror movies that try to be artistically different than the rest of the field with varying results. Production-wise, the substance is superior to most horror films of the last couple of years. It’s really hard to complain about any technical aspects of this.
THE BAD STUFF
MARGARET QUALLEY (THE BAD) – Respectfully speaking, I do feel that if you are going to cast someone to play the object of desire and someone who physically embodies fashion magazine levels of unattainable physical beauty, then there are less than a handful of actresses who can embody that presence like Qualley. Full stop. She has cornered the sexpot market completely.
Why do I say that? Because she’s technically been in three different films this year where she’s played this exact kind of character. In drive Away dolls, she was a much funnier redneck-ish object of desire, and in kinds of kindness (in the first section of the movie) she pretty much plays this exact character, except she doesn’t talk as much.
I know one of these days, she will get a a chance to do something out of left field in a big studio movie. She’s done a couple of indies that show potential to branch out from this type of character. She’s really good. And I understand the casting in this movie especially of her to play this kind of a role, I’m just waiting for something different from her. Something new.
S*** THAT JUST BOTHERS ME – They don’t look alike. At all. Right? Am I insane? Demi Moore is 61 years old and has been around since she was 19. When she was Qualley’s age, she was co-starring in A FEW GOOD MEN.
Nothing alike. Even if you wanted to return to the Brat Pack days, there’s no point in history where these two actresses have looked alike. It is worth mentioning because these two women are playing the same character. Not mother and daughter, or aunt and niece, or cousins. THE SAME PERSON. And I can’t help but ask if they couldn’t have just cast an unknown that shares at least some features with Demi Moore other than their hair color. I know this is a really small thing to gripe over, but this is just stuff that bothers me, okay?
THE UGLY STUFF
WRONG GENRE (IMO) – Had this been a sci-fi drama, this would have been one of my top five for the entire year. Hell, had this just stayed the course of a normal body horror kind of drama, it still would have cracked the top 10. But this movie doesn’t just want to be a body horror film… this wants to be a grossout body horror film.
**MINI RANT ON DECK**
Do not order food when watching this movie because this movie is going balls to the wall to try and make you not finish your popcorn. There are so many repeated close-ups of grotesque imagery and moldy objects. So many super close-ups of festering wounds and open gashes. So much gore that is wildly overdone, accompanied by squishy noises.
Oh my God, these f****** squishy noises…
Imagine having a big open jar of jelly before you, sticking your hand inside, and moving it around. The sound that would omit from that activity is the sound they use for every solitary action in this film. When someone eats food, whenever there’s a close up, whenever someone puts on a shirt, whenever someone does an action and the score in the background is not playing, for some reason there’s just that squishing noise. And that’s before things start getting extraordinarily bloody and gory to which that squishy noise is in mother f****** hyperdrive. I found it a test of my endurance to try and eat the nachos I ordered. Every time I put the chip to my mouth, something extremely nasty would happen on screen, and I would have to fall back.
The excessiveness that is the third act of this movie, combined with the ultra-gross-out moments of the last 45 minutes, killed all of the goodwill I had for this movie up until that point.
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Ultimately, the message of the film is very powerful. It speaks a lot about women’s pressures as they age. A lot of people are very two-faced when it comes to how they treat younger women as opposed to older women. That message is expertly portrayed and thoroughly emphasized by the end of the second act. It led to something very powerful, in my opinion. And then the Tromaville-level gross-out bull**** took over and derailed the proceedings.
My first instinct was to suggest not to see this movie. But then I realized that I’m just not a body horror film kind of a guy. And because of that, this isn’t my vibe. This isn’t the type of movie I usually see, but I do have to be fair.
If you’re unlike me and are a horror aficionado, this is for you, and you’ll love the ending. If you are not. Then you absolutely won’t.
THE SUBSTANCE is in theaters now
